How to Cheat the Vote: Appendix AA

Posted on Sunday, February 10, 2008 | 2 Comments

AA standing for Advertising Age. Which is where Ken Wheaton describes how his Republican primary vote ended up being cast for Hillary Clinton.

So I slide into the voting booth and go to the pull the lever and … nothing. It doesn’t budge. I try again. Out of curiosity I lightly pull on one of the Democratic candidates’ levers. That seems to be working fine. I stick my head out of the booth and tell the guy there’s a problem. I tell him I’m a registered Republican, at which point he announces to the entire table, “Oh, this guy’s a Republican,” as if it’s been six generations since they’ve seen such a thing. In fact, one of the other workers says, “A Republican? Really?”I want to make it clear: This wasn’t a case of voter intimidation. It wasn’t as if the poll workers said, “Ewwww, is there slime coming out of his butt” or “Oh, so that’s what Satan smells like.” No, it was more a sound of amazement. I suddenly knew what the Great White Buffalo feels like. That said, I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to announce a voter’s affiliation across the polling place. You’d think the Board of Elections would cover that in the classes it gives to poll workers.

So the guy fidgets with the outside of the booth, then comes back and STEPS INTO THE BOOTH WITH ME. “Go ahead and try it now,” he says, watching over my shoulder. I reach for the lever and … nothing. “Hold on,” he says, and steps outside of the booth, fiddles with the machine, steps back into the booth and says, “Now try.” Lather, rinse, repeat. I suggest maybe the big lever that registers the vote might have to be reset for this to work. At first he says no, but then changes his mind. “Well, we’ll just have to throw in a vote,” he says.

At this point, he selects Hillary Clinton then pulls the lever. Ka-ching. One more vote for Hillary.

We then try again. Nothing. So he gives me a paper ballot.

That is slick from the poll worker/vote cheater’s point of view! Work the polls. Get paid. Get to vote many times. I wonder if this Hillary Clinton-supporting Brooklyn poll worker was a New Hampshire resident for a day back when Hillary Clinton had the miraculous and unexpected win against Obama earlier this primary season.

Well, it’s slick unless you are an actual voter who obeys the rules and doesn’t habitually cheat and defraud his (or her) way around the world.

Related:
How to Cheat the Vote
Even Jimmah Carter favors photo ID to guard against US voter fraud

h/t: Alarming News

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2 responses to “How to Cheat the Vote: Appendix AA”

  1. whydidyoudoit | Sunday, February 10, 2008 at 03:36 |

    According to the demographics, I should be voting for Hillary Clinton: I’m a white, 60-year-old, highly educated woman from the Northeast. But I’m voting for Obama. I’ve waited all my life for a viable woman candidate for the presidency, but this is not the right woman. I want a woman of the highest ability and virtue, who would serve as a glorious role model to all young women. Hillary Clinton is not that woman.
    She rode into power with her husband, and together they’ve acquired a long and seriously flawed history of self-serving and secretive financial and political dealings. The most cursory research will prove that true. She started out her political life supporting the racist Barry Goldwater. She is as comfortable with deception and trickery as George Bush. When I hear woman saying, “Oh, but that’s how you get things done in Washington,” I literally cringe.
    I am passionately supporting Barack Obama. He can beat the Republicans; she cannot. Obama has attracted Independents and even Republicans to his camp, and in a general election they would vote for him, but not for Clinton. Clinton voted for the war, and has never apologized for it. Obama has spoken out against it from the beginning. Obama brings us hope–and not just that. Take a serious look at his ideas and experience.
    Please, I beg of you, Sisters young and old: wait for the right woman. Then we can be proud.

    Diane Wald

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